That one man

The recognition
I took up a book and started to read.
The language was tough.
I could not understand a tiny bit of it.
Turning it over, I found that I had picked up a French book.
"Is it French?"
I was not sure about that.
Flipping through the book, the dust in the book started to escape before me.
It made me want to sneeze.
"Ha~~Chiu!"
I sneezed anyway.
I was so engrossed with myself until I did not realize that there was a person in front of me.
And I sneezed right at his face.
That was embarrassing.
"Hey!" he looked at me annoyingly.
Clearly, I had pissed him off.
"I'm so sorry."
I said in return.
He looked at my face and did not say anything.
"Is there something on my face?"
I could not help but wondered.
I ignored him and started to walk away.
He called me back.
"Hey! Wait!"
I was already a few steps away from him.
I turned around and looked at him.
"What do you want?"

The First Struck
"Okay, that was awkward and embarrassing."
When my thought went back that day, I could not hide my awkwardness.

"What do you want?" This question came out too harsh but I did not mean it.
He started to come near me. I did not realize he was that tall.
"I do not mean to be judgmental, but do you really want that book?"
He pointed at the book that I was holding in my hand.
Only then I realized that I was holding a book in my hand.
"What book is it?"
It seemed a little bit too late to ask that question.
Turning it over, I saw the title of the book.
I could sense a skipping of my heart.
I just stared at the title of the book like it was alien words that I could never understand.
It seemed like eternity.
"101 Totally Cool Ways to Have a Beard!"
I could feel my face was getting warmer.
Without saying anything in return, I put the book back to where it belonged.
When I turned away from him, his hand hold me back.
"What now?"
I just wanted to escape from that place.
And from him.

The Name
"You seriously don't remember me?"
"Well, that was the oldest trick." I thought.
I turned reluctantly and looked at him.
"No, and please let go of my hand! I'm in a hurry."
I no longer had the decency to be polite to him.
The part of me in a hurry was actually a lie.
I've always believe that humans' abilities to lie are not hardwired into our DNA.
We learnt to do so and were taught to do so since we barely knew how to spell that word.
I just wanted to get away.
"Oops, sorry."
He apologized to me and let go of my hand.
My heart dropped a beat.
When I was free, I could not bring myself to leave.
"What is wrong with me?"
I was getting very uneasy.
Seemed like there was a force that hold me there.
He looked me in the eyes and I could not divert my gaze.
"Jane."
"How does he know my name?"
My face might have shown something.
He seemed surprised.
"Jane, I'm Max."
"Oh! That name sure sounds familiar."
When that name resounded in my mind, something strange happened.
It was like a lock in my heart was suddenly forced open.
My mind was searching through the memory lanes to uncover the stories behind the name.
Max.
I spoke the name loudly in my mind in order to digest each and every letter of it.
It was like there were answers in the name.
Max.

The past
Max.
The third time I spoke out that name, something struck my heart.
I did not know what had happened.
It was the name I remembered so well right before I graduated from the secondary school.
A gush of feeling came through my body and I was getting warmer and warmer.
There was this name in every single letter and diary that I had written so far.
This name had pinned so hard to my heart that I could never wipe it out.
Until one day, Lizzie told me a heart-breaking news.
She loved him.
Oh! What was it like?
It was like the world had shut its door in front of me.
Since then, I burnt everything that reminded me of him.
The letters, the diaries and the photographs had all turned into mere dust.
So did my pathetic love.
Not long after that, I heard that she had confessed her love to him.
And I did not even bother about the ending.
It was none of my business.
It never was.

The phone number
"Oh! Max! Hi!"
I said after a long pause.
Maybe pretending to be in a hurry was not a bad idea.
"Finally you remember me. Am I that easy to be forgotten?"
He smiled broadly.
He was getting closer to me.
"No, just that you've changed a lot."
I lied again.
The truth was meant to be hidden.
"Is that it?"
He seemed not offended by my remark.
"Am I detaining you?"
He smiled at me again.
That smile did some strange chemical effects on me.
"Y...eah."
My voice came out too weak to support my statement.
"Maybe we can catch a cup of coffee sometime. Can I have your phone number?"
Well, that was uncalled for.
But, I gave him anyway.
Maybe a small part of me was hoping that this was not the end of the story.
How I carried myself home that day was a blur.
The feelings that I burnt down with those letters seemed not ready to be put off.
What should I do?

The Special One
"Why she was in such a hurry? Am I that scary?"
I really could not understand her reaction.
"Why did she seem so surprised to meet me there?"
"Am I some kind of alien or what?"
Something in my pocket was buzzing.
Looking at the phone, I was in no mood to pick it up.
It died after some time.
I put it back in my pocket.
"When was the last time I meet her?"
It seemed so long that I could not recall.
Maybe three or more years?
I remembered having a gathering right before we graduated.
But, she did not show up.
And that was it.

I dropped myself on the bed.
My hair was still wet from the bath I took just now.
But, I did not care.
The phone rang and died.
Looking at the phone, it was a message.
An unknown number.
"Hey, Jane! I"m Max. Are you free this Friday night?"
I quickly snapped my butt out of the bed.
Oh my!
What should I do? Accept? Refuse?
Or ignore?
I had no idea.
My phone rang again.
This time was a call.
I looked at the phone.
"Hello?"
It was him.
"Hi, Jane! Have you seen my message?"
"Yeah, whats'up?"
"I was just wondering if you would like to go to a place with me."
He sounded so enthusiastic and refusing him seemed like a tough job.
"Jane?"
I still could not answer.
"Jane, it was just going to be you and me, if you're not free..."
"Okay, I'll go."


The date
It was a date.
Definitely.
I spent almost three hours in front of the mirror, trying
to get ready for the date.
But, nothing seemed perfect.
The clock ticked by and the time was running out.
Five more minutes.
He was early.
I climbed into his car.
He smiled at me broadly.
"Hi, Jane!"
I replied back followed by dead silence in the car.
Maybe I should say something?
I slowly looked up at him.
He seemed much more mature and handsome.
Maybe being thwarted by lives' difficulties.
When he caught me looking at him, I quickly turned away.
He chuckled.
I felt embarrassed.
It was awkward.

The confusion
"Jane, where have you been these years? I never see you at our gathering."
"Yeah...I was...kind of busy."
"Is it? I thought you're avoiding me."
My head snapped up at his remark.
Why did he has such thought?
"What? Why? Of course not!"
My questions came rambling out.
It all jumbled up.
The car stopped in front of a big building.
A red one.
"It's just that I never get in touch with you. Nobody does. I try to contact you but nobody knows
your phone number. Even Lizzie."
He seemed confused.
"Lizzie? You meet Lizzie?"
I could not hide my surprise.
"Yeah, she invited me to her wedding the other day. She was going to invite
you too but she could not get in touch with you."
Neither of us get out of the car.
It seemed like some questions needed answers.
He looked at me intently.
"There was a rumor back at school."
"What was it?"
"They said you liked me."
Now he was holding out his hand.
He was moving closer to me.
I was struck there, unable to move or say a single syllable.
He took hold of my hand, holding my gaze.
"Is it true? Do you love me still?"
I did not know how to react.
"Jane, answer me."
His grasp became stronger and tighter.


The confession
I looked down at my feet.
"It was...it was true."
He did not reply.
He was waiting for me to say something.
"I liked you back when we were in the school. But, I
thought you did not like me so I..."
"Wait, Jane. Who told you that?"
"Look at me, Jane!"
I was becoming breathless.
"Lizzie said she liked you and she was my best friend.
I could never stand between she and you and I was confused.
You seemed to like her also. And I..."
My tears came pouring out without giving me any signal.
It was uncalled for.
"What? No! She did say she like me but I did not accept.Then
you turned into I-Hate-Max-very-much-and-he-is-my-mortal-enemy thing. I was confused."
"I was trying to keep my distance."
My voice came out very weak.
"Jane."
He pulled me into his embrace.
It was warm.
He smelled so nice.
"Jane, it's okay. It's okay."
He gently stoked my hair.
"Do you love me still?"
"I love you."
And then all the words and confusions were melted in our kiss.